When something impossible is placed before me, often times I think about and vocalize my doubts perhaps more than I should. Especially during this phase of my life when I am fundraising and really taking a step of faith that God will come through when I have placed everything in His hands, I have expressed a lot of concern as to how, when, or if He will come through. I am a transparent person with those around me, and I am not regretting having shared the things on my heart. However, I regret having doubted God so much.
I read Matthew 9:27-30a this morning:
“As Jesus went on from there, two blind men followed him, calling out, ‘Have mercy on us, Son of David!’
When he had gone indoors, the blind men came to him, and he asked them, ‘Do you believe that I am able to do this?’
‘Yes, Lord,’ they replied.
Then he touched their eyes and said, ‘According to your faith will it be done to you’; and their sight was restored.”
One thing about faith that is so interesting to me is that God does not generally come through until we are in a moment of crisis and have expressed our unwavering belief in His ability to deliver us. Many great moves that He makes come after our declaration of trust. He doesn’t boost our faith by simply showing us an impossible situation and how He can handle it. Rather, He brings us to a difficulty, waits until we say with shaking voices, “Yes, Lord, I believe that you are able to do this” and He comes through in whatever way He sees fit. The first step of faith must be ours.
Here are some examples of what I’m talking about: David’s declaration to Goliath before he kills him, the march around Jericho for a week before the walls came down, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego and the fiery furnace, Daniel and the lion’s den, etc. These are just a few examples of the people of God having to take the step of reckless faith into an impossible situation and finding themselves in the middle of it before God came through and saved them. Oftentimes God will lead us to and into a time of struggle, allowing us to feel the pain. He asks us the question, “Do you believe I can do this?” We then take our mustard seed of faith and reply, “Yes, Lord,” and hold on tight.
I sense that God is asking me this question now, “Do you believe that I can do this?” In the midst of all the uncertainty that I am feeling, I remember the things that I am sure of: God brought this into my life and He called me to it, He has never failed me and He can do anything. Therefore in faith, I choose to answer, “Yes, Lord, I believe with all my heart you can do this. I look forward to telling your story of deliverance!”